Wednesday, August 8, 2012

The day The King of Pop died

Sorry to leave everyone everyone hanging.  I literally had to force myself to quit typing or I would have stayed up 'til 6 a.m.  I'm still having a difficult time trying to figure out how to set up the design of this blog.  I have no idea what I'm doing.

After learning about the Bitch, the first thing I thought was, "How did this happen?  I don't do drugs, drink, smoke, whore around (never did).  Hell...I rarely drink soda!!  I even worked out like 4-5 days a week!!!  What did I do to deserve this?  Was I that terrible to my parents?  I know between my brother, sister, and I, I was the one that gave them the most grief but was I REALLY that bad?  All I really wanted to do was hang out with my friends. It's not like I was out making out with boys."

I read and was told that if one were to get cancer, the "best" cancer to have is cervical because it's localized.  Whatever!!  My first surgery was a partial hysterectomy.  They removed my cervix but kept my ovaries.  Luckily, I didn't need chemo.  It took about a month for me to recover and life went on...until 9 months later.

I clearly remember, it was the day Michael Jackson died.  We were at the YMCA.  I was taking the kick boxing class.  I've taken this class numerous times so it wasn't more strenuous than normal.  It's always been a challenging class but for some reason this overwhelming feeling of fatigue came over me.  It was so sudden that the instructor even noticed.  She thought it was strange for me to take breaks.  "Yeah, you're right.  I don't know what my deal is.  My boys probably wiped me out."

The weeks following, I started feeling bloated and tightness in my belly. It never even occurred to me that it could be that Bitch.  I eventually went to my PCP and after having an x-ray it showed that I was constipated.  "Ok...I can deal with that.  Just take a laxative and I'm good to go." Nope!!!!  My stomach started to swell.  It got so bad that looked like I was 8 months pregnant.  I even had to break out my old maternity jeans!!!  It was awful!! I went back to my PCP and she immediately ordered a scan.  The scan revealed that I had a tumor on my ovary and she knew immediately that the cancer was back.

Back to my oncologist I went and scheduled for surgery.  The days waiting for surgery was agony.   My stomach was growing bigger and bigger and I was in a great deal of discomfort.  The day before I was to have surgery, I started having difficulty breathing and I almost passed out in the shower.  Luckily, at the time my parents were here and Chris was working from home.  I thought I was going to die that day. 

Chris rushed me to the hospital and they immediately admitted me.  I initially was scheduled to have surgery first thing in the morning but they ordered an xray to see if I had fluid in my lungs.  Thank GOD there was no fluid.  If there was, I would not have been able to have surgery.  So off to surgery I went and the next think I knew was waking up in ICU connected to all these tubes.  "What?  This wasn't planned!!!!"